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Sunday, July 17, 2022

My Magnificent Mountain - rearview

  Been awhile since I even thought about my blog, I forgot why I love blogging so much, it is a diary of days or months for me- I can go back and review my minds history of ideas, creativitiy, life moments good and bad. I am in the midst of change right now. Not sure why, but I presume it has to do with turning 63- or I should say politely-over 60. The good things first.  I truly am living in my God given purpose- supported by amazing husband, friends and family- my faith is strong tho tested, my goals remain strong and clear ( helping those who are struggling with memory loss, and the ones that care for and love them).  My super empath heart wants to make life better for the families I serve. It is my joy.

 Now the hard things... At this time, my biggest battle is ...my own resilence is gone.  I am overwhelmed, I feel like I have lost more battles than won. I am trying to define myself in a new structure, new sphere of life, trying to make the days I have lived count, trying to  make new days count as well.  Grief keeps showing up everywhere and made larger by my thought life. SO,  here I am July 17, 2022 pouring it out,  a record of my thoughts. It will get better, I know, but in this moment I want to learn what these testings have accomplished, where are they taking me. so I write.  This is a recourd of that path.

 Small insight today:

When you are on top of the mountain that  you have climbed so dilgently, having come through struggles along the way, you think wonderful now I can rest! Then you see the many other peaks along the ridges ahead to be accomplished. You have done it before you can do it again. With great perserverance you head down to the valley for a stroll  to another  new climb - only you get one obstacle, one delay, one turn gone worng after another and you realise you have to do it all over again.  However, before you can even begin to climb again you must camp out on the ridge for awhile, get used to the air, breathe,make a plan, get up, move slow.  THAT is where I am, soul weary and in need of a rest.

Whats helping today:

 Reading a wonderful book called Fractured Faith  by Lina  Abujamra- slowly digesting it- making it part of my  daily intake. Some days I go back and stare at " my magnificent mountain" I was on top of and remember things in the rear view mirror are not always whet they seem. GOD is here with me, not there, He got me there,  He led me here. He is Walking slowly in front of me, catching my face when I turn around and saying to my heart - look at me chld - follow me- eyes on me. Today we go forward. 

Monday, December 27, 2021

the art of letting go


 Ways to let go and trust God

loosen your grip

drop it

walk away

give it up

accept the answer

say goodbye

disconnect

turn away

What to let go of

bad emotions

bad people

criticism of self and others

things that don't work

things you don't need

things that take up space

things that don't fit you, or your life,

right to be right or right to  have an answer

finding perfect

fear of failure

This is my year to Let Go - praciticing letting go, and do it.









Friday, October 8, 2021

62. Birthday 10/7/2021

Feeling pretty perfect today.  Wonderful home life, beautiful living. Making everyday count.
            
Blessed with an amazing husband that supports me in soul,spirit and mind! My precious animals that are a comfort and joy, a family that is funny ,loving and always a phone call or text away, grand children that warm my heart daily, a small group of amazing friends near and far, food on my table, nature out my door. And most of all God is in it
 all  ......everyday ..always good ,faithful and forever my guide. 


 




Sunday, September 12, 2021

A few of the past.


 The many mixed media faces from last few years. Seeing my style emerging  and growing

New direction


Giving figurative painting a try.  Realy enjoy the vintage
 look of this one. Very DowntonAbbey like❤
 

Sunday, May 2, 2021

Another try at a new look.


A walk in the woods. 12X12. On etsy. #catartnsoul


 

Spring and my muse is back

 been a very uncreative time for me this winter. Covid blues perhaps,back pain issues or sadness over the events in the news. Art is my healer so I did some😁, I just got out paint and went for it. Took a few weeks but feeling more creative as spring arrives. 

Used a "Kees Van Dogen" as inspiration. In my journal. Felt wonderful to paint. I think I will continue to be inspired by the famous artist I adore.